Forgiveness: the narrow way

Apart from the main narrative in the Bible; the story that inspires me is Joseph’s story.

Being sold by your brothers; the ones you were headed to serve, and in the process they get a hold of you and sell you! It must have stung deep. I know it did because of how he treated them when they re-united in Egypt and couldn’t recognize him. And mostly because of how he wept away in agony. It is from this story that we get the famous, “…you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good,…” Gen 50:20.

Now, I know, obviously Joseph is an archetype of Christ. However, I ask myself if i was sold by, not even family, but friends, would i be able to forgive? How come i sometimes find it so grievous to forgive my trespassers?

The Bible clearly lays it down, you shall love your neighbor as you love yourself.” And, as Christians we understand that ‘our neighbor’ includes our enemies so we are left with the dreadful duty of loving our enemies. It’s a very lovely idea until you have something to forgive. Nevertheless, smack at the center of Christianity we find, “forgive our sins as we forgive those who sin against us.” So what are we to do?

CS Lewis advises two ways to make it easier: The first way; just as we learn mathematics, we do not start with calculus but with simple addition. Hence we can first learn to forgive simple things. The second way; is understanding what loving your neighbor as you love yourself means. He explains it this way: you do not have to be fond of yourself (feel nice about yourself) to love yourself. In fact, you sometime loathe your bad actions (God knows i do) like envy, impatience, etc. But I go on loving myself without the slightest difficulty about it. You do too, right? Feeling sorry that I was the sought of person who did those things; yet i loved myself. We can hate the action but ought not hate the man.That’s the Christian teaching.

Does loving your enemy mean not punishing him? Absolutely not! loving myself doesn’t mean that i ought not subject myself to punishment, even death. – In case i murder someone (which i won’t). Christian morality as opposed to ‘secular’ morality, is concerned with that inside part of the soul that in the end will turn to a heavenly or hellish creature.

Resentment and revenge must simply be killed. No matter how many times they prop up their heads, we must hammer them down.

I admit this means loving people who have nothing lovable about them. But then has oneself anything lovable about it? You simply love it because it’s yourself. Perhaps it makes it easier if we remember that is how God loves us, not for anything nice about us, but because we simply are selves.

Ephesians 4:32; “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you”

“Proverbs 17:9; Love prospers when a fault is forgiven, but dwelling on it separates” close friends”